Saturday 7 November 2020

How the Love Gets In

We begin to smile when it comes to our own foibles. Carol Burnet said, Comedy is tragedy plus time. Stroke is certainly a tragedy. That inside place for humor may be spontaneously awakened by watching your favorite standup comedian, or viewing a humorous cartoon, or merely observing the daily rituals of those around you. When you think of it, the new way you learned to dress after stroke may put a smile on your face. For women, putting a bra on backwards doesn't seem natural. But I soon realized that my 18-hour bra lived up to its name because it took me about that long to learn to put it on! Humor can be found in the most unlikely places and spaces in our lives. Underneath her longing to die was the wish to come out of the grave she had dug for herself. Her pain told her, Your way of life has been a death in disguise. In a sense, she could not commit suicide because she already lived as a dead woman. She was right to despair: living a lie is hopeless. When listening to a person who wants to die, find out why. Something does need to die. Not the person, but her way of dying while alive. How Death Talks to Us While some seek a death they can avoid, others try to avoid death when it is inevitable. How does a therapist talk to a dying person? Acceptance of anxiety symptoms is the key. By cultivating an attitude of acceptance in the face of anxiety, you allow it to move through and pass.

Anxiety is caused by a sudden surge of adrenaline. If you can let go and allow your body to have its reactions (such as heart palpitations, chest constriction, sweaty palms, and dizziness) caused by this surge, it will pass soon. Acceptance of the initial symptoms of anxiety is very important, but then it's time to do something. When anxiety comes on, always accept it first, then realize that there are many things you can actively do to redirect the energy spent on the anxiety into something constructive. In short, don't try to fight with anxiety, but don't do nothing either. To cope with anxiety in the moment, there are three types of recommended activities: (1) coping strategies, which are active techniques to offset anxiety or distract yourself from it; Use Coping Strategies Coping strategies are quite useful for disrupting a panic attack at an early stage (that is, before it gains a lot of momentum), generalized anxiety (excessive worrying), or repetitive obsessive thoughts due to obsessive-compulsive disorder. To make matters worse, every thirty seconds the experimenter harassed the participants with negative feedback (Come on, get a move on) and urged them to speed up. Afterward, some of the participants were left alone to recover in silence, while others were played either classical music (Pachelbel's Canon and Vivaldi's Four Seasons: Spring, movement 1), jazz (including Flamenco Sketches by Miles Davis), or pop music (Sarah McLachlan's Angel and the Dave Matthews Band's Crash into Me). Blood pressure readings revealed that listening to pop or jazz music had the same restorative effect as total silence. In contrast, those who listened to Pachelbel and Vivaldi relaxed much more quickly, and so their blood pressure dropped back to the normal level in far less time. Here Comes the Sun. Work conducted by Matthew Keller at the Virginia Institute for Psychiatric and Behavioral Genetics, and outside colleagues, looked at the relationship between the sun and emotion. People who had spent less than the magic half hour in the sun were actually in a poorer mood than usual. Perhaps, as the authors suggested, people resent being cooped up when the weather is pleasant. Get in Touch with Your Inner Clown. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and you increase your chances of a heart attack. I've instructed patients to use biomagnets as a self-care home treatment in between visits. All of these techniques have worked well for relieving and sometimes completely ending chronic allergy complaints.

A word of advice, though; This will give your body a chance to change in order to lessen or eliminate the seasonal symptoms. Acupressure: Keys to End the Sneeze Acupressure is a great way to temporarily alleviate a runny nose. The best part is that you always have your tools at hand. Jack prides himself in being fit. He is an avid runner and road cyclist who also practices daily yoga and is conscientious about his nutrition. Two years ago he came to me mortified that seasonal allergies in the spring and fall had given way to year-round sniffling and sneezing. I think I hear you saying . I imagine you might be feeling . Right now you look as if . Let me tell you how I understand your viewpoint. But surely this is human communication, not merely psychotherapeutic communication. We all long for the experience of visibility and understanding. Should we not seek to give it to one another, to make it a natural part of human encounters? Effective therapists judge but are not judgmental. They judge in that they obviously assess some behaviors as superior to others from the point of view of the long-term happiness and well-being of the client. They are not so hypocritical as to pretend that they are without standards--or without likes and dislikes. If I had been the medical proxy, I'd have asked for comfort care measures only. Not because I didn't love him, but because I loved him enough to want a natural and relaxed death.

Instead I saw grimaces, sores, fear. I saw tubes and syringes. I saw the family he'd worked to create break apart during the following weeks of serious decline. Alzheimer's is tricky because the person can't voice their readiness to die. But there are other diseases that go on a long time too, and people who are aware, who want to die, and speak up about it. Indeed, a majority of Americans support an individual's right to do so, and, according to the Pew Research Center, six in ten adults now think that people have a moral right to end their own lives if they are suffering and have an incurable disease. My projection is that there will soon be many more right-to-die states. But for now, what do you do if you find that you're going to be in a situation that might make your life go on too long? I open my eyes, suddenly puzzled. She cocks her head to one side, as if unsure if I'm being serious. I think she's genuinely surprised by my denseness sometimes. But she realises that right here, right now, I can't access that information. So she reminds me. They limit you. You have to put an awful lot of effort into avoiding reality. It's an exhausting strategy: you have to keep on denying and dissociating, because as soon as reality strikes, you're helpless to deal with it. It's much better, surely, to resolve the pain and the trauma so that you don't have to expend all that energy avoiding it any more? I nod but I'm confused. Avoid slouching because a slumped over posture closes off your heart. You want your heart and mind to be open during your meditation

Your shoulders should feel loose yet rolled back and down a little bit Your hands should sit on your lap, on the arms of a chair, or rest on a cushion Your head should be straight with your chin tucked in slightly, and the back of your neck should feel long and loose Your face should be free of tension, and your jaw loses Have your feet flat on the floor There are individual meditation chairs available that will help you sit comfortably and achieve an optimum posture. You can search meditation chairs online to see what's available. Avoid meditating right after a big meal Avoid slouching because a slumped over posture closes off your heart. You want your heart and mind to be open during your meditation Your shoulders should feel loose yet rolled back and down a little bit Your hands should sit on your lap, on the arms of a chair, or rest on a cushion Your head should be straight with your chin tucked in slightly, and the back of your neck should feel long and loose Your face should be free of tension, and your jaw loses Have your feet flat on the floor There are individual meditation chairs available that will help you sit comfortably and achieve an optimum posture. You can search meditation chairs online to see what's available. Avoid meditating right after a big meal For example, someone who values friendships will have a life story, or identity, that emphasizes friendships. For healthy identities, these stories have coherence and some degree of continuity, and, thus, your identities can guide your decisions and choices.

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