Sunday, 24 May 2020

Self-esteem is the collection of beliefs and feelings

My decorations lasted until I got in the taxi. I felt kittenish, overdone, and dishonest. You should take each step and carry it out not only with joy, but also with great purpose. Check if this will change your perception of the world that is around you or even your mood, and see if it can still be possible to bring it to more of the daily behaviors that you take part in. after that, you can take the next step and see if it is possible to carve out a little amount of time for meditation, maybe immediately after waking up or before retiring to bed. You understand where some of your biggest overthinking triggers are, you're working on gradually removing or lessening the things in your life that tend to cause information overload, and now it's time to address the chaos inside your mind. In recent years, the idea of clearing your mind in order to be able to focus on life's goals or daily tasks has become very popular. Many writers and speakers have offered tons of knowledge and tips for how people can start the process of sorting through, evaluating and then removing unwanted clutter from their minds. I believe that an important first step in this process is to examine and understand what is clogging up your mind. This way, you can begin to connect those sources of overthinking with the thoughts running through your mind. Cleaning up the source of overthinking is just as important as removing the individual thoughts from your brain. And remember, human beings are programmed to take in and process information. There are things you notice while biking which you don't when driving a car. There are also things you notice when walking which you won't see if you're riding a bicycle. Of course, this change has brought physical benefits as well, as I'm simply moving around more, rather than sitting in a car for hours. I've also given up the position of CEO in the company I own, and have taken a back seat. Many of my friends also perceived this as a retreat, but the opposite is true. Stepping back became a step upwards, as it enabled me to create new avenues for activity within the company. My change in position helped me shake off old habits. This has proved to be a positive experience for me, as well as for my staff.

I also changed the way that my small but dedicated team of employees is remunerated. In addition to their level of responsibility and contribution to the company, we now consider the needs of their families. Your mind will chalk up your cowardly acts and ignore your acts of heroism. Unfortunately, every example of you acting like a wussy only strengthens your belief that you are a coward. The brain works like this: your actions must be congruent with how you see yourself. If you do anything out of the ordinary, which against your self-perception, your brain will just skip over it and ignore putting it in your memory base. Instead, it will only register and store the cowardly beliefs that you continue to have about yourself. Why? Because your belief systems is what dominates your thinking. This is how powerful and influential your belief system is. Your mind filters everything out through your beliefs. Unfortunately, most people have self-limiting beliefs about themselves. Give yourself an entirely new day to edit down your list. Budget a day or two for revision--you may not get it right the first time. It's only going to take a day to give yourself the time to imagine your funeral. But expect that it will take several days to reflect and process on what the exercise has shown you. Remember to save one day at the end of the week for rest and reward. Filling in the time frame and mission should require less than a day. You'll spend the bulk of your week mapping out a week-to-week or month-to-month strategy. Remember to set aside at least a day for rest and rewards.

Spend the first few days practicing breathing when lying down, for one or two minutes at a time. Repeat this, and the rest of the Centering exercises, three to seven times a day. I wiped off the lipstick and as much eye makeup as I could and stowed the earrings in my pocket. I left the necklace on, though, because it felt nicely cool against my collarbone. I went into the restaurant wearing, as it turned out, just one added thing. A few days beforehand, Anne and I had gone out for pizza with the little girls, and I'd decided on the spot to tell her about my experiment. I'd been nervous and thick-tongued as I apologized for the omissions and explained why I'd not chimed in as often as I might have with the shopping talk. Anne's reaction had been subdued and typically matter-of-fact. You might have looked a bit grizzly now and then, but none of us are winning any articleants, are we? She'd reached for a crust that Eva was flailing. I really never noticed anything except the haircuts, she'd said, laughing, and you told me all about those. It was the best bubble-popping of my life. Some of this information is stubborn, triggering emotional responses that can't just be clicked and dragged to the recycle bin like on our computers! It will take some time and focus to get into a routine and make real progress toward clearing your mind and learning to organize and evaluate the value of thoughts and feelings as you continue living your life. This journey is the start of a life-changing and lifelong process. Just because you banish chaotic thinking now, doesn't mean it's never going to try and creep up on you again in the future. Have confidence in yourself and your ability to move forward. So, what do I mean when I say, declutter the mind? Put simply, there is no way for you to start cultivating better habits and more positive thinking without first clearing away the thoughts that are hindering your progress. Many thoughts and habitual cycles of thought are connected to emotions that hold us back and even block our views of what's really going on.

We've talked already about how outside influence and inner turmoil can manifest into a distorted view or evaluation of a loved one, a coworker, parent, or even child. Some people take in so much negative information about the world that they lose all sense of trust or respect for people, even complete strangers! My own salary has been reduced, as I don't have as many financial obligations as before. I no longer need to support a family with young children, nor pay a mortgage. Since these duties are behind me, I wanted to do something to make life easier for the younger generation. Personally, I feel that I've gained a great deal from these changes and have not given up anything of real value. I have also consciously modified and enriched my relationships with my significant others -- spouse, family and friends. I now enjoy my time with them much more than in the past. I have found that my growing sensitivity to them has enriched my sensitivity to myself, as well as their understanding of me. In turn, this new attitude has also enhanced my ability to respond in a mindful and thoughtful manner to other people generally. There are thus many situations where I now feel the positive effects of the integration of the emotional, logical, physical and social dimensions that the wisdom years offer us. The more I mindfully activate this integration, in whatever I am doing, the more fulfilling my life becomes. They believe with certainty that these negative beliefs are true when they may not be. In other words, they have fused with these limiting beliefs. When you are fused with negative beliefs, they can paralyze your thinking and limit you from reaching future goals in your life, work, training, and relationships. These limiting beliefs will hold you back from growing. Truthfully, the majority of your belief system is about your self-identity and what you can't do. The sad part is that most of your limiting beliefs about yourself are false. Nevertheless, these false beliefs are true to your reality. You inadvertently conditioned yourself to believe these lies.

However, with the defusion techniques you have learned in this piece of writing, coupled with the new experiences or reference points you've created, you can part company with these false distortions that have held you back for years and kept you in fear mode. Let's go back to the example of you believing you're not good with numbers. Allow another day or two to make sure that you're able to breathe properly in a sitting position. Spend the remainder of the week practicing while standing. Make sure to set aside the last day for rest, when you do nothing but reward yourself for having accomplished these activities. Your intention will be to learn to Center. After you pick your point, begin proper breathing. Check for tension in your key muscles. Do this for a day or two, until you can get your key muscles relatively relaxed in less than seven breaths. Give yourself at least two days to find your center in seven breaths or less. Spend a day or two trying out different process cues and directing your energy. Remember to save the last day for rest and reward. I'd guessed a year ago that Anne would be amused by the idea of my experiment. That she still was came as a tremendous relief. What had been emotionally wrenching for me could be a hoot for other women. Since the subject was no longer off-limits, Anne, Grace, and I talked that night at sushi about how strange and eye-opening my experiment had been. I admitted how many questions it had raised, as opposed to providing answers. As we loitered at the counter, our conversation moving to other topics, I felt a total absence of appearance angst. I was just happy to be sitting at dinner with friends, my orthotically supported feet dangling off the stool, and nothing but soy sauce on my lips. Anne and I walked home that night through the warm, familiar Hong Kong streets, passing its sights, signage, and people.

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