Saturday, 31 October 2020

A great year is 12 great months

This profile included the qualities, interests, and spiritual beliefs that were most aligned with his own. Or when my client Nicky was about to hire a new administrative assistant, I had her create an ideal profile by considering the type of assistant that would support her in doing her best work. It's much easier to pass up good for great when you've clearly defined what great means to you. Now it's your turn. Choose an area of your life where you need to set an ideal in order to pass up good for great. For example, if you'd like to meet a romantic partner, you might need to profile an ideal mate. Or if you've decided to look for a new job, you might want to profile an ideal company. You can even use this exercise when making a purchase or a major decision. Taken together, research suggests that complex decisions may best be made by integrating conscious and unconscious processes (Nordgren, Bos, et al. SECTION REVIEW The How of Social Cognition: Two Ways to Think About the Social World Social cognition is governed by two systems of thinking: a cognitive system that is conscious, rational, and controlled, and an experiential system that is unconscious, intuitive, and automatic. The two ways of thinking influence attitudes and behavior Implicit attitudes are unconscious, automatic, and based on learned associations (often called heuristics). Conscious, explicit attitudes are relatively independent of implicit attitudes. Hence, the same person can hold opposing implicit and explicit attitudes toward the same thing. Routine behaviors can become automatic, but in novel situations, the cognitive system takes over to make deliberate, reasoned judgments and decisions. The cognitive system requires awareness, motivation, and ability. If these conditions are not met, the cognitive system is interrupted, whereas the experiential system is relatively unimpeded. Perform a digital detox: From time to time, consider staying away from all technology for a day or more. This will help reduce the amount of information you're exposed to and clear your mind.

For more tips on how to declutter your mind and increase your focus, refer to the corresponding section at the beginning of this article. In short, to overcome distractions you need to: Be aware: Identify the areas area of your life that interfere with your goals. Understand how success works and change your mindset accordingly. Implement an effective strategy: Spend time to craft an effective plan that, when you follow it, will deliver the results you desire. Don't reinvent the wheel. Instead, copy what people who've achieved your goals have done. Be patient: Life is a marathon, not a sprint. For example, you might profile your ideal new home or an ideal new school for your child. Set your ideal in place now. Fill in the blanks below. I need to create an ideal profile for_____ My best case scenario is_____ My top seven characteristics are: Once you've defined your idea of great, it's important to honor your criteria. Challenge yourself not to settle for anything less than what you really want. For example, if you're an employer looking to hire an ideal candidate, be patient while you interview as many people as it takes to find the best. If you're a business owner who has clearly defined your ideal project, be willing to walk away from a good project in order to keep the space open for a great one. The unconscious can be smart The unconscious does smart things such as consolidating memories and guiding decision making.

The What of Social Cognition: Schemas as the Cognitive Building Blocks of Knowledge Learning Outcomes Define schemas. Explain how priming of schemas influences both our impressions of people and our behavior. Define confirmation bias and give examples of how it occurs. Explain how metaphors can help us understand abstract ideas. So far we've outlined the broad motives and systems that guide how we think about the social world. Let's turn now to consider some of the more specific thought processes that underlie what people think about. Think long term and you will achieve far more than most people ever do. The following should be your mantras: Be patient, and It's okay, you have time. Be consistent: Stay focused on a specific course of action and follow it consistently every day until you achieve your desired results. Overcome your fears: Be honest with yourself and face your fears instead of using procrastination as a way to avoid leaving your comfort zone. Remember: action cures fear. Commit: Set a specific goal that excites you. Establish a clear deadline and resolve to achieve your goal. To help you succeed, make your goal public or find an accountability partner or coach, if needed. Avoid information overload: Have a clear intent behind what you do, create a learning schedule, and remove as many distracting external stimuli as you possibly can. The more focused you are, the less overwhelmed you will feel. Trust me, it will be well worth the wait! Let's look at another way to pass up good for great: by using the Absolute Yes test.

THE ABSOLUTE YES! In Take Time for Your Life, I offered readers a simple, yet powerful way to honor their top priorities: by creating an Absolute Yes list. This list consisted of seven items that readers deemed most worthy of their time and energy. The Absolute Yes list became the governing document that allowed readers to make wise choices. If it wasn't on the list, it wasn't a top priority. I took the concept of an Absolute Yes a step further by using it as a way to test whether or not something was important enough to get my time and attention. It has become an important tool that helps me and my clients make decisions that honor our spiritual standards. For example, my client Laura used the Absolute Yes test as a way to honor her spiritual standard of making her self-care a top priority. The first thing to notice is how quickly and effortlessly the mind classifies stimuli into categories. Categories are like mental containers into which people place things that are similar to each other. Or, more precisely, even if two things are quite different from one another (two unique individuals, for instance), when people place them in the same category (frat boys), they think about those two items as though they were the same. This makes life easier. Mental containers in which people place things that are similar to each other. THINK ABOUT To appreciate what categories can do, stop and look around your surroundings. What do you see? As for this author, I'm sitting at the dining room table in my house. I see my laptop in front of me and a stack of articles nearby, along with my half-eaten lunch. Honor your promises Breaking promises is another act that goes against the principle of completion.

When doing so, you open loops and fail to close them. You might think that not keeping your promises or saying yes to people out of courtesy isn't a big deal, but I think it is. Because breaking promises means your words have little power. You say things but don't follow through. As a result, you can't trust yourself because you know you will probably renege on your promises anyway. People who can't keep promises to others, usually can't keep promises to themselves either. If you break your promises often enough it will become a habit. As a result, whatever goal you set, you probably won't take the actions required to achieve it. For example, whenever she was invited to a social gathering, she'd ask herself the following question before she responded: Is this an Absolute Yes? If the answer was anything but a resounding yes! My friend Sophia used the Absolute Yes test in a different way. One of her values was beauty, and Sophia had a spiritual standard of honoring this value in all aspects of her life. Whenever she shopped for clothing or home accessories she checked in to see if her purchase was an Absolute Yes before making a decision. That way, Sophia was able to maintain high standards about what she allowed into her closets and into her home. I have learned to trust this test by allowing it to guide the choices I make in all areas of my life, from which restaurant I choose to which business opportunity I should or shouldn't pursue. It's never let me down. It takes courage and practice to use this test when making decisions. In the beginning there will be plenty of times when you're tempted to say yes to something that's a maybe or a not bad. There are pictures hanging on the walls, a plant in a corner of the room, and our pet dog near my feet (probably hoping for some of the lunch). Just within this 4-foot radius of my world, things are already pretty complex.

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