Your Opening Act

Delivering a speech to a large audience, Doing a skydive or a bungee jump or anything else that scares you, Learning skills you consider impossible, or Cold calling people. Of course, whether or not something is impossible is highly subjective. The key is to choose something you think you could never do and to give it a try. Additional tips: Below are some tips to help you move beyond your comfort zone: Take Action! Build Your Courage Muscles To begin the process of building your courage muscles you'll want to set yourself up to succeed. Any courageous act can be made easier with the right inspiration and preparation. To do this you'll need three things: A history of success A courage talisman As you've already learned, having someone in place both before and after taking a difficult step is a necessary requirement for success. That way, regardless of the outcome, you end up with a loving friend who makes you feel great. There are a number of ways to use the support of others. Figure and Ground Do you see a vase or two faces?

The mind plays an active part in how we construct reality. After thinking about that first kiss, you might see the image in Figure 3. Look again, and you'll notice that the same image can be seen as a dark vase against a white background. The fact that the same physical stimulus can be viewed in more than one way shows that the perceiver has an active role in what is perceived. The whole is more than the sum of its parts. The insights of the Gestalt school had a tremendous influence on social psychology. If the mind constructs an understanding of even simple stimuli like the image in Figure 3. What are the specific mental processes through which we construct a meaningful understanding of the social world? Join a group of people who do what scares you (eg, if public speaking scares you, you could join Toastmasters, a public speaking group). Just do it once. If you can do something once, you can do it again and again. The important thing for now, is to do it just once. Have skin in the game. Use your hard-earned money to invest in a course, find an accountability partner, et cetera. The more you have invested in the game, the more you have to lose (see also the section, Seek external accountability). Exercise: do the impossible Write down everything you think you could never do. Now, select one thing on this list and commit to doing it this week or this month. For example, if your leap involves giving a speech, you might ask a few friends to listen as you practice your delivery. If you need to make amends to someone you've hurt, have a friend available to speak with you once you've had the conversation.

Or if you feel nervous about your first trip abroad, speak to someone who's been there so you know what you're in for. The next way to set yourself up to succeed is to create a personal reminder of your strength and ability to handle what comes your way. To do this, take out your journal and write the following: Three challenges that I've successfully handled in the past are: When I asked my client Morgan to do this exercise she picked the following three situations: Going back to school to finish my degree Facing an empty nest Next, I asked her the following three questions: The research area known as social cognition emerged in the 1970s, with the goal of answering this question. Its penetrating discoveries are at the heart of the social cognitive perspective and also the topic of two articles in this article. In the next article we will cover the ways that people make sense of this world. In this article we focus on: The basic motives behind thinking The two ways that people think about the social world Schemas as the building blocks of what we know A discussion of motives and behavior The Why of Social Cognition: The Motives Behind Thinking Learning Outcomes Meet new people Have you ever felt as though you can't find your tribe?

If so, instead of looking for the right people to connect with, why not attract them? Why not create an event they would want to join? Often, we tend to forget how much power we have to create the reality we desire. We can allow our external environment to determine what our lives are going to be, instead of deciding what we want. We often let what happens to us dictate our lives. However, in truth, what happens to us is not that important. What matters is what we do about it. We don't have to change what's outside, we only have to change what's inside. What qualities of character allowed you to handle these challenges? In what ways were you resourceful? What did you learn from these experiences that might serve you now? Here's what she said in response to the questions: In each of these situations I called upon my patience and ability to persevere in times of great stress. I have a strong mind and a sense of determination. When I decide I'm going to do something I can count on myself to do it. I'm smart enough to reach out to my friends when I'm upset about something, rather than lashing out and hurting someone. This helped me immensely with my divorce and when my two children moved out on their own. Finally, after raising my children, I've become more resourceful and organized. Distinguish three different motivations that guide thought and decision making. Identify when each of these motives guides thinking.

When you gaze at the image in Figure 3. In essence, it is choosing between two interpretations. In a similar way, our everyday thinking about the social world is largely a matter of choices, many of which are made without our conscious awareness. The difference is that, in our social life, the choices are much more challenging, and the consequences are often more important. A major challenge to making sense of the social world is the sheer quantity of information that is available at any given moment. Imagine that a friend is coming over to watch a movie, and she's asked you find a good one on Netflix. Now you're scanning through hundreds of movie titles, most of which you've never heard of. You could learn about each one if you read the plot summary and dozens of customer reviews. And, as we change, everything changes for us. You aren't a powerless creature. You can proactively create the environment you want to live in. You can create the circumstances that allow you to meet the people you want to meet and achieve the goals you want to achieve. So why not work on creating your own eco-system? Why not create your own tribe? This is more effective than simply hoping you'll meet the right people. Fortunately, these days, it has never been easier to create your own group. For example, one of my friends created a personal development group in London, which allows him to meet cool people while pursuing his dreams--he is in the field of personal development. A few weeks ago, I joined an English conversation Meetup. When I set goals, like completing school, I'm able to break down my plans into manageable steps and find the help I need to methodically get the work done. I've learned that I can accomplish anything with a plan, good friends, and a strong belief in myself.