Take adequate breaks of relaxation

The more you rely on your inner ally, the stronger and more able you are to face any fearful circumstance. If you have trouble coming up with language for your inner ally, ask your partner or Life Makeover Group members for help. Ask someone in your group to act as your inner ally by speaking to you in a competent, powerful voice about your best qualities. Be sure to write down these statements so you can begin to develop the script that you'll need to help create your own inner ally. There are other practical reminders you can use to bolster the voice of your inner ally. They include: As I was finishing up this section, I happened to speak with my friend SARK, an experienced writer who has written more than eleven articles of her own, the latest of which is called Prosperity Pie. I asked SARK how she handles her inner critic. In Navajo culture, the first person who sees a baby smile, which typically doesn't happen until about six weeks after birth, is expected to throw a party to celebrate it. Perhaps not surprisingly, people are just as likely to try to avoid that honor as to try to be the lucky host; Ornamentation All cultures share certain elements but put a distinctive mark on them. For example, people in virtually every culture use jewelry, tattooing, and other techniques to adorn their bodies and advertise their status. The particular style of ornamentation, however, differs greatly from culture to culture. The photo series shows four people of diverse cultural background. First photo shows a beautiful Indian bride in traditional wedding dress, posing for a photograph. Second photo shows a young Thai girl wearing the traditional brass ring on her neck. Third photo shows a man with facial tattoos. Gather all of them on the floor of one of your rooms. Then hold each item in your hand and ask yourself whether you really want to keep them.

Imagine you see this item in a store today, would you buy it again? Hold them in your hand one by one and see how each one makes you feel. Would you love seeing the article you hold in your hand on your articleshelves every day? If not, you might want to get rid of it. If you have unread articles, you probably want to sell or donate them unless you're excited at the prospect of reading them. But remember, if you really wanted to read them you would already have done so, yes? Also, you can always buy a new copy later if you feel the urge to read it. The rule of thumb is to discard everything. This is what she said: Well, I have several. Some inner critics I banish and some I reassign. For example, I have reassigned the inner critic that tells me that I need to take care of everyone to be of value, to Afghanistan. She's taking care of refugees right now while I'm focused on my writing. Are there some inner critics you need to banish or reassign? Which ones? Who are they? Watch Your Words Now that you're taking better control of your thoughts, it's time to talk about the importance of shifting your language. Take Action! Fourth photo shows a white man with diamond grillz in his teeth. All cultures have social roles, positions within a group that entail specific ways of acting and dividing labor, responsibility, and resources.

The enactor of a role usually communicates that role through certain forms of conduct, appearance, and demeanor that are recognized by other group members. Some roles, such as those defined by gender, can inform the person's thoughts and actions across a very wide range of situations. Other roles, such as orchestra conductor, dictate how a person acts in a particular situation. Roles help define the self-concept. For example, a person's self-definition may begin, I am an American citizen, a mother, and a professor. Cultural symbols represent either the culture as a whole or beliefs or values prevalent in the culture. In cultures where members share a nationality, flags are often used to symbolize the culture's meaning, history, and values (Callahan & Ledgerwood, 2016). Cultures defined around religious beliefs often create and recognize sacred symbols and artifacts, such as crucifixes and masks. After all, papers will seldom, if ever, bring you joy, right? Marie Kondo recommends you only keep papers that fall into one of the following three categories: Papers currently in use, Papers needed for a limited period of time, and Papers that must be retained indefinitely. Note that this category doesn't include papers with sentimental value, such as letters. Miscellaneous items This category includes anything else in your house except items with sentimental value. This could include CDs, electrical equipment, accessories, et cetera. Divide the items in this category into main sub-categories that make sense to you. Revise Your Vocabulary This week, pay attention to how often you use words that undermine your power.

Refer back to the list you created earlier and check out the list below for some ideas on how to shift your language: Old Words New Words I think I know I'll try I will Maybe Definitely I'm not sure I'm positive I guess I'll confirm that I'm sorry I'm confident Because symbols are seen as embodiments of cherished beliefs, ideals, and other aspects of cultural identity, they often are treated with great care, and in some cases only by select individuals. As a demonstration, try seeing if you can borrow the original U. Constitution for the weekend. Cultural symbols are central aspects of a culture's rituals, which are patterns of actions performed in particular contexts that reinforce cultural beliefs, values, and morals and that often signal a change associated with the end or beginning of something of biological, historical, or cultural significance (eg, birth, puberty, marriage, the founding of one's nation, annual holidays). Funerals, weddings, tea ceremonies, puberty-related ceremonies (eg, confirmations, bar and bat mitzvahs, quinceaneras), birthday parties, and bridal showers are typical rituals. Another common ritual in universities and colleges is the commencement ceremony (FIGURE 2. Rituals serve a number of psychological functions, including helping to solidify social cohesion of the group (Watson-Jones & Legare, 2016). Universities and colleges around the world hold commencement ceremonies--rituals that mark the beginning of the graduates' entrance into the real world. Like many other rituals, commencement ceremonies vary in distinctive ways from one institution to another. At the University of Kansas, for example, graduates walk through the doors of a large bell tower and down a big hill to the stadium, where the formal ceremony takes place. Then, take each item in your hand and decide whether you want to throw it away or keep it. Again, make sure you get rid of anything that doesn't actively bring you joy.

Items with sentimental value Throwing away items with sentimental value might be challenging, but it is a wonderful opportunity to reflect on your past and let it go, so that you can open yourself up to new opportunities. As Marie Kondo beautifully puts it, It is not our memories but the person we have become because of those past experiences that we should treasure. So, don't be afraid to let go of any item that keeps you stuck in the past. Many of these objects have already played their role. Unless you absolutely need them to move forward, let go of them. Throw away or donate items you don't need anymore Put every item that you don't want to keep in bags and throw them away. I'm so stupid I need a break It doesn't matter Here's what I want We'll see I will Now, list your three old words or phrases along with the new words or phrases that you'll replace them with here: Ask your partner or someone from your Life Makeover Group for help in coming up with new words or phrases that are more empowering. When you do, there's a great little technique you can use to help break the habit of using language that hides your power. You'll need a partner with whom you spend a lot of time and who you trust to have your best interest at heart. Ask that person to gently tap you on the shoulder when you use a word or phrase that you'd like to change. Let this gentle tap simply remind you to stop and shift your language. When I have clients use this technique with a loved one, it usually takes about two weeks for the reminder to stick. At the University of Hawaii at Manoa, graduates are ushered into the ceremony by selected male and female students, each carrying a ko`o, or ceremonial wand, that symbolizes complementary male and female energies. SOCIAL PSYCH OUT WORLD