Friday, 30 October 2020

Do you feel angry?

Many of us struggle to keep up with society's pace. High-speed computers and quicker Internet access force our minds and bodies to adjust to increasing speeds. The sound bite and sidebar strategies of advertising companies and the news media overstimulate our nervous systems on a daily basis. For example, while watching CNN or other news programs, you can now check stock prices, sports scores, and other late-breaking news all at the same time. As we consider the reality of how hard it is to stay connected to our inner lives, we're all faced with a fundamental truth: We live in a world that forces us to shut down the very thing we need in order to experience deep meaning and fulfillment--an ability to stay connected to how we feel. Most of us are constantly living in our heads--thinking, calculating, anticipating, multitasking, analyzing, and doing, doing, doing. This overfocus on information has placed a high value on what we know instead of how we feel. Unfortunately, the experience of leading a rich and fulfilling life comes not through thinking, but through feeling. Fortunately, the scientific method and the communal nature of the scientific enterprise typically weed out these biases in the long run. But it is important to realize that scientists are human beings subject to the same needs, desires, and expectations that produce bias in all other humans. Third, not all questions can be answered scientifically. Many of the most pressing crises facing us today involve questions of values, morality, and ethics. Although social psychology can fruitfully employ the scientific method to understand how values develop, change, and influence human behavior, science cannot tell us which values are the right ones to invest in. Is safety more important than freedom? Are the rights of the individual more important than the welfare of the group? Should scientific knowledge be used to restrict behaviors that are injurious to the people who engage in them? These are important questions we all will be facing in the years to come, and although science can help us understand the consequences of different courses of action, it cannot tell us which consequences are more important than others and which values we should use to guide our decisions. Fourth, human values exert a powerful influence on the way science is conducted. You have put your inner critic in his place. Now listen to the powerful power voice that tells you exactly what you want.

To do this, use a powerful, strong voice that tells you that you can achieve anything if you have the will. Do not give up until you have reached the desired goal. Not achieving goals is based on giving up too early. Many people fail because they deviate from the actual goals when difficulties, arise and the feeling arises that the goal is unattainable. This is exactly the point at which you should start again. This is what successful people do. They stay on the ball despite difficulties and problems and keep going. They look for new ways and possibilities to reach the goal and constantly work towards it. For example, when you get together with your friends, it's probably not your conversation about politics or work that gives you a sense of connection, it's the feeling of joy and camaraderie you get from being in their presence. Your conversation may be intellectually stimulating, but isn't it the laughter, the love, and the feeling of being connected that you most often remember? Feelings are your inner guidance system--your emotional compass. When you allow this compass to direct your actions you build self-trust. When you feel hungry, you eat. When you feel tired, you rest. When you feel lonely, you reach out for connection to others. In this most basic way your feelings link you with the wisest part of yourself. They tell you what you need to know at any given moment. I am always so touched by the people who come up to me after a presentation to share their personal stories. The questions we choose to ask -- or, perhaps more importantly, choose not to ask -- are often determined by nonscientific political, religious, and/or economic factors. For example, studies of the genetic underpinnings of behavior were actively discouraged or prohibited outright in the Soviet Union during most of the 20th century because communist ideology claimed that all differences among individuals are the result of environmental influences of the state and society;

Similarly, questions pertaining to women's contributions to science and politics are unlikely to arise in cultural milieus where females are regarded as uneducable subordinates. Scientists, like all other human beings, live in a world of values, morals, and ethics. Sometimes these values limit the search for truth that is the ultimate goal of the scientific method. But human values also direct scientific inquiry toward questions that serve our highest aspirations and steer scientific research away from practices that would violate these values. SECTION REVIEW Theory Building: The Engine of Scientific Progress Theory and research have a cyclical relationship: Research provides systematic observations; Features of a Good Theory Organizes the facts. Reframing things into a new frame For you to succeed, your creative thinking is required. This is how you constructively tackle situations, things, and events and redesign them according to your wishes, requirements, and concerns. The focus here is on the way things are viewed. There is nothing in your life that is fantastic or bad. It is up to you what you make of the situations and requirements. Just change your perspective. A situation that burdens you doesn't look so terrible from another perspective because you put it in a different context. To use reframing, you must have the will to touch things and want to shape them according to your laws. If a situation arises again where negative emotions arise, just ask yourself what this is good for and what you can use these emotions for. Often, as someone starts to cry while relaying the details of a particular situation, they go out of their way to apologize for their tears. I usually stop them and offer a gentle reminder that crying is good.

I've come to see tears as a sign that our soul is trying to tell us something important. When given permission to relax into their feelings, I actually can see the relief wash over their body. Many of us learn to shut off our feelings early in life. Girls are typically taught to stop crying or refrain from being so sensitive, while boys are taught to suck it up. This callous disregard for our emotions has left most of us sleepwalking through life. When we are disconnected from our emotional center--our inner compass--it's only natural that we feel lost. Opening your heart and allowing yourself to feel can be frightening at first. As you do this there's a good chance that you may experience moments of sadness, guilt, fear, anger, or other uncomfortable emotions. Explains observations. Inspires new research. Generates new questions. Has practical applications. Internal and External Validity Abstract ideas need to be made specific and quantifiable to be manipulated and measured properly. Studies should be able to be replicated using the same and different operationalizations of variables. Limitations of Science Human knowledge is limited. Humans are biased. Often interesting answers arise from the what for questions and suddenly it becomes clear that the negative situation also brings nice advantages. Don't be annoyed when it rains outside, but try to feel the joy of being out in the rain.

Do not see a job termination as a loss, but as a chance for a new start. Turn a sour lemon into delicious, tasty lemonade. If your project is not going well at the moment, don't get upset about it, but learn from the experience and start over again in other ways. The experiences will also help you with new projects. Through the knowledge you create a more effective implementation and can better watch out for sources of error. Besides reframing there is also pre-framing. Here you set the frame before a situation occurs. Preframing is seen by some as much more effective. That's why so many people flee from connecting with how they feel. In my own life I've learned that suffering comes more from repressing how I feel than from the act of feeling in and of itself. In fact, when we neglect to express our feelings fully, those buried emotions can take a heavy toll on our health. Swallowing anger, sadness, or bitterness and carrying this heavy baggage in our bodies can result in everything from depression and physical illness to even death. Our unexpressed emotions can also become toxic obstacles that prevent us from moving forward with our lives. I remember an example of this from a woman who was courageous enough to stand up during a seminar and admit that her anger had become so overpowering that she was unable to connect with any positive feelings. She said: I realize my unexpressed anger is what's preventing me from connecting with my passion. I've got all this rage inside and I just don't know how to get past it. CONNECTING WITH HOW YOU FEEL How do we begin to connect with our emotions? Some questions are outside the scope of science. Human values influence the questions asked.

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