Being Modest

Venus won't tell you what zodiac sign fits best with yours, but she will describe the personality traits and life circumstances under which you'll meet. Like Mercury, Venus travels close to the Sun. It's why she will only appear in your own sign or in one of the two signs that precede or follow yours. She will never be farther away from the Sun in your chart than that. Unlike Mercury, she's much more visible in the nighttime sky in the hours before dawn or just after sunset. Venus is the third brightest light in the sky after the Sun and Moon, and when's she out (which is for about nine months at a time) you can't miss her! Venus in one of the two signs preceding your Sun sign means she was rising before the Sun when you were born. When I was at Shop etc magazine, we sent a size 8 fit model into eleven stores and had her try on various designer trousers to see which sizes fit. Our model was trying on pants, but the results of our survey translate to skirts as well. You say you don't wear jeans? Then you are missing out on the one item of clothing that has replaced the little black dress as the must-have staple of every Y&H wardrobe. I'm a total convert now -- with five dark denim pairs and one white pair currently hanging in my closet. But as recently as 2001, I wouldn't be caught dead in jeans. I did a segment on jeans for the Today show, but I wasn't even wearing them myself. If Katie Couric had called me on it, I was prepared to say, You know I'd do anything for Today viewers -- except wear jeans or a bathing suit on the air! Flash forward to July 2003. I was taping a segment for the TBS show Movie & a Makeover about Barneys New York Denim Bar. It is also the first step towards the action you take to reach your goal. Compare yourself to a skydiver. When he makes the decision to jump out of the plane (his comfort zone) he takes a step through the opening in the fuselage and dives into the air with the goal to land on the target marked on the ground.

Once he has jumped there is no way of turning back and entering the plane again. He is falling towards the ground at breakneck speed in his quest to achieve his goal, but also towards disaster if he doesn't take drastic and well planned action to keep him on course and avoid failure. He needs to position his body correctly before the chute opens to prevent injuries. When that is done he has to pull the ripcord to open the chute. Once it is open he has to pull the strings to the left or right of the chute to steer towards his goal. Elements like crosswinds, visibility, timing, precision and more all play a role in the actions he takes to overcome these obstacles and to reach his goal. In life many people make similar decisions, but are still running around like ostriches unable to take flight towards their goals. As he opened up and let me in, his original feelings of rejection around his mom surfaced, together with his lifelong longing for deeper connection and intimacy. As his bond with me strengthened and he allowed himself to be seen and warmly accepted in therapy, he began to reach out to co-workers and create new friendships. He risked getting closer, sharing more deeply with his new friends than he'd ever done before. As his capacity for emotional intimacy with friends expanded, his pot use decreased and eventually stopped altogether. As he let in the nourishment he received from his friends, anxiety stopped being an issue. Becoming bolder, he started dating seriously. To feel less anxious and more excitement, it's necessary to have a good deal of positive, warm relationships in your life, at least your personal life even if it isn't possible in your professional life. Too little contact (isolation and loneliness) or too much contact of the wrong kind (stressful, angry, toxic relationships) brings anxiety. Even being surrounded by lots of superficial relationships creates a sense of isolation. Early life experiences mold us to create certain kinds of relationships. Noticing the signs when you start to feel afraid (perhaps you fidget or feel a tightness in your chest) or when you first feel the heat of anger (maybe your neck gets flushed), you can choose a coping strategy and change course before it is too late. If you decide to call a friend before anxiety overwhelms you, you might distract yourself enough to go to sleep that night instead of lying in bed listening to the ticking clock. Most people have a hard time leaving an argument when their temper is fully inflamed.

Seeing your anger in an early stage, before the conversation goes too far, you can choose to end the conversation or change the tone before you reach your edge. Physical Sensations Our bodies can reveal our emotions, but most adults are experts at ignoring their bodies. Despite backaches, twitchy eyes, or knots in their stomachs, people tell themselves they are fine. When you pay attention, your body's signals can warn you as you approach a limit. Do you feel a headache coming on when you don't know where she is? Feel sick to your stomach when he shouts at you? Someone has to set the agendas and organize the team's efforts. We didn't do that initially, and our teams quickly moved into the second stage of development, the dissatisfaction stage. The reality of working as a team always seems to be more difficult than team members expect. In the training sessions we learned that teams in dissatisfaction need continued strong, clear leadership. But they also need supportsomeone to listen to their concerns and cheerlead for any progress made. We learned that, while this dissatisfaction stage is uncomfortable, it's a critical stage for ultimately becoming a high-performing team. It was in this dissatisfaction stage that we began to experiment with a role we still use today called the 'team coordinator. Marvin said, We use team leaders in my company, but I have an idea you mean something a little different. Luis nodded and said, During the initial stages of our teams, the team coordinator, in many ways, acts like a manager. After a team moves into resolutionthe third stage of team development, when members begin to learn to work togetherwe start to rotate the role of team coordinator among team members. Your decisions and your attitude make your life. If you DO some of the things suggested in this article, create new habits, and do just some of the many exercises that you will find here constantly, things will start to shift. It's not going to be easy, and you will need discipline, patience, and persistence.

But the results will come. This quote of Dalai Lama says all you need to know about worrying. Read closely what he says. If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it's not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever. Most of us worry constantly. This makes her a morning star. Morning star Venuses are the that looks good attractions. You fall in love quickly, romanticize rhapsodically, and can easily be led on or astray. Friends may chide you about your serial infatuations, but the truth is your romantic pursuits make you a better person. You become wiser, deeper, and better dressed. It takes you a while to get things right--you're not always clear on whether you're in love with the person or your idea of the person--but eventually you find your match. Your lover will always be your muse. Venus in the same sign as your Sun means you're often blindsided by love. There's little distance between the Sun and Venus, so you may have no idea of the Venus signals you're sending. It's great if the person you're secretly crushing on surprises you by making the first move, but not so great if someone you never thought of in that way starts getting uncomfortably sexual. Surrounded by the latest styles from all the top labels, I bought my first pair of jeans since college. I've since appeared on the Today show in jeans -- in jeans segments and even when the segments aren't about jeans. I look better in my jeans than in any other piece of clothing in my closet.

If you can't make the same statement, it's because you haven't found the right pair of jeans. But once you do, you won't know how you ever lived without them. You really need to have several pairs -- ideally three or four -- for dressing up, shopping on a Saturday, hanging around the house, and maybe even for work (depending on your job). No matter what your age, nothing says Y&H faster than a perfect pair of jeans. Jeans are forever cool. Of course, the right pair is crucial. The wrong pair will simply make you look OL -- or, worse, as if you're trying too hard to look young. You might also have made decisions in moments of haste, under pressure, out of emotional needs or some other reason. While there is nothing wrong with making a decision to turn your life around, there might be a problem with the reason why you want to do it. Your reason why you want to realize your dream creates that burning desire that drives you diligently towards the final product. It is the main force that will free you from the mental restrictions you or others put on yourself and from the chains that bind you to a life of misery and suffering. Do not make the mistake of building your motivating why on destructive and negative emotions like fear, jealousy, hatred, revenge, greed, anger, inferiority etc Look at this example: A few years back I learned about a guy who made a decision to pursue his dream of one day owning and driving a V10 sports car. He had a burning desire to experience the exhilarating sensation of sound and vibration the power train creates at full force. He longed to own it and craved the pleasure it would give him to drive it. After he made his decision he set his well-planned operation into motion to achieve his goal. At that stage there was nothing wrong with what he wanted to achieve. Since these attachment patterns are usually unconscious, depth therapy is helpful in bringing them to light and allowing new relational possibilities to develop. Remember, you learn about relationships in a relationship. You can't learn new patterns on your own.