Ridding Yourself of Bad Habits

Look at your list now. Everything not erased are things or tasks that need your attention. How much of your long list is left? From experience, I'd say max. That means the other 90% are things you can't do anything about and you might as well drop them because all they do is take space in your brain and drain you of your energy. How would it feel if you eliminated this 90 %? Remember that every person you meet on your life journey has a story. And if they do? Then yours is the bond that once joined can never be put asunder. What if Venus is retrograde in your chart? Venus retrogrades are famous for attracting what you don't like--like unwanted attention and unholy boors. Venus retrogrades often show up in the charts of people who experience bullying. The trick to working with Venus retrograde is not to withdraw into yourself. Venus's strength is in numbers. Even if you're a loner, there are millions of loners just like you. Venus retrograde means trouble fitting in. You may have to leave your home or travel outside your emotional comfort zone to find your people, but once you do they'll stick by you through thick and thin. But what separates a great pair that'll take ten years off from one that's OL can be summed up in one word: fit. And fit is a big part of what you're paying for when you look at brands with price tags in the triple digits. According to Cotton Incorporated, 85 percent of jeans shoppers say that fit is their number one concern, and most of us say that we'd actually pay up to 28 percent more for jeans with the right fit.

It's a jeans truism that the younger you are and the better body you have, the more you can get away with an inexpensive pair of jeans. In 2004, when I did a Today segment on great-fitting jeans with Natalie Morales, the only person who looked amazing in the $19 pair was my twenty-year-old intern. It's not that I want to pay more for a designer label; Prices keep inching up, but most designer jeans cost somewhere between $150 and $250. Cotton Incorporated says that only 4 percent of jeans fall into the premium category (which they define as costing more than $60! To me, the moral of that story is, most people go for low-price jeans, and some look like hell in them. Just because you find a pair of jeans that fits over your body doesn't mean that they're flattering. He would pay so they could order whatever they wanted and enjoy themselves while they wait. While they were all sitting waiting, he drove down the road next to the bar with roaring engine making sure they see the powerful car. Then he turned around and drove back slowly. He stopped opposite them and shouted: Hi, guys, you'll have to pay for your own drinks, I'm off to see some better friends! He revved the engine a few times, gave them the finger and sped off burning rubber. After this he struggled to make friends again. He used the car to impress people instead of enjoying the thrill of driving it. Later he got rid of the car and left for another city never to be seen again. Even though negative destructive motives are also strong enough to drive you to your goal, it will not yield long term positive results or fill you with any joy and happiness. Nor will anyone else benefit from it. Dave loved the first few years of his job at a promising start-up. As he rose to higher positions, however, and even after they'd gone public, the stress grew more intense. After five years, working long hours and often on weekends, Dave had become a nervous wreck.

The demands of the job had escalated to an unsustainable level. He had trouble sleeping, he'd stopped working out, he had little time for recreation, he was always checking his phone at home. Work had become his life. Although it was financially rewarding, the stress was killing him. He entered therapy complaining of anxiety attacks and stress. While everyone has emotional stuff from childhood, sometimes it's the present situation that needs to change. The first order of business was for Dave to learn to incorporate stress reduction strategies into his life. He asked his mother to sit with the kids two nights a week so he could stay at work without worrying about his family. These two nights significantly reduced his stress about work, even if they didn't match his ideal of how he thought his life was supposed to be. To keep from ruminating all the way home, he had two alternatives ready: he would think about the kids' school projects or sing along to music whenever he noticed resentful thoughts creeping in. Harvey did not assent to his wife's drinking with these changes. He did make his life better for himself and less dependent on her behavior, in turn putting himself in a better position to influence her behavior. Braking Before You Break: Setting Your Limits Ignore the signs to your limits and you may be on your way to a breaking point. Hitting that point can set you or your loved one back by adding to hurt feelings, confusion, and a variety of other unhelpful emotional states. In the moment that you break, your reaction feels justified--that's the nature of being overwhelmed and not thinking straight. If you can see your breaking point a half mile down the road, however, you can slow down, pull over, adjust your expectations, and set a limit. Absolutely. Any time we're to make a decision on a complex matter, we have to make sure each person has an opportunity to express his or her opinions and concerns. We do this not only to be fair but so that each individual's talents can be brought to bear on the problem.

When a team has reached the production stage, what is it able to do? Over the last year or so, our teams have taken on more and more important decisions. A number of teams are now at a point where they actually do all or many of the functions traditionally viewed as the job of managementsuch as hiring and disciplining, performance evaluations, allocation of resources, quality assurance. These teams have really replaced the old management hierarchy. He shook his head thoughtfully. What's wrong? Several times today I've been faced with the evidence that empowerment really works, but it challenges my old beliefs. Probably they have gone through something that has forced them to grow and changed them. Don't forget that every person you meet on the street probably has a story as compelling and complicated as your own. Everybody you meet is as extraordinary as you are - even if it doesn't seem like it at first sight. The least you can do is to give them a chance. Give them a chance to become a part of your life or to interact without judging and discarding them right away. Everybody has something to offer. Some of my best friends are people that when I first met them I thought What a strange person or He doesn't seem to be very bright. If I would have guided myself by these superficial judgments I would have lost great friendships. When I look back at my life, I notice that the greatest experiences in my life came from giving people a chance, even if my first impression advised me against it. Of course, many times, my first impression was also right, and I ended up disappointed. You can gauge Venus's strength in an astrological chart by determining if it's in domicile, detriment, exaltation, or fall. Venus is at home (domicile) in Taurus and Libra. Roses bloom in Taurus's month and grapes are harvested in Libra's, so Venus literally rules over the days of wine and roses.

Venus is out of season (detriment) in Aries and Scorpio. These are the two Mars-ruled signs, which means your Venus attracts trouble. Venus is exalted in Pisces, a sign famous for its compassion and empathy, and Venus is in fall in Virgo, a sign famous for looking after itself. Whether Venus is exalted or in fall doesn't mean it's a good or bad Venus. Yes, it's always nice when love comes easy, but that doesn't necessarily make it true love. VENUS IN ARIES You're a magnet for trouble. If the fabric doesn't bend, the shape doesn't suit your curves, or the legs make your thighs look huge, they are not the right jeans for you. But if you can buy a pair for $20 that makes you look amazing and gives you a great butt, bravo! Cool jeans are an investment. I probably get more wear out of my jeans than out of anything else I own. I'm still wearing the pair I bought in 2003. If you take good care of them (see the section on caring for denim), they'll last for years. Don't assume that you can bring just one pair of jeans into the dressing room and find The One. More likely, you'll pull on and off a dozen or so pairs, so shop when you have the time and the patience to try and try and try. To make the task a little less overwhelming, find a store that not only carries several brands but has sales staff who really know their stuff. You want an expert who can quickly size you up and hand you several pairs to get the process started. It is the results of why you are doing something that's important. It should satisfy your need for love, happiness, joy, peace, love, fulfillment and a sense of achievement. It must create a burning desire within you to want to achieve it and energize you to overcome any circumstances until you've made it.