Monday 26 October 2020

The Secrets of Successful Transitions

If we notice that one is encroaching our boundaries, it is not a reason to place ourselves in an offensive or defensive stance, or to demonstrate righteous anger. Anger and blame are just signs of our repressed fear and unresolved guilt. Of course that needs to be acknowledged and explored. It is necessary to learn the difference between determination and defense, as well as the difference between yielding and compassion. This may be difficult at first, because we have all learned, to suppress our needs and alter our boundaries. That is why we usually react with guilt, fear, and anger when we are forced to set or reset them, which usually occurs only following a period of ingestion, indulgence, and accumulated feelings of discomfort. Some people defend their borders very firmly, and very aggressively, blaming others for small things. You should feel some warmth and see some redness after these steps. Step 5 We get much more gentle as we're moving on to the eye area. We use our ring fingers here, draining outwards towards the temple with gentle, light, superficial strokes and there should be no tissue movement. Step 6 I do pressure points. Using the flat of your thumb or your forefinger, NOT the tip, try to find the flat part of the bone about two fingertips away from each nostril. Press in to release facial tension and bring down puffiness - keep doing this all the way along the cheekbone. Step 7 is to apply your skincare products and go to sleeeeep! In the morning, I do just the eye bit prior to makeup and when I'm lying in bed, I flick the skin outwards with the pad of my middle finger, as if I'm moving a small wheel or roller ball (like on the bottom of an old school mouse) quickly. This is to get your circulation going and reduce puffiness. Jade rolling They also essentially respond out of fear and guilt, but these feelings are much less accessible to the conscious mind. Such individuals were likely to have been injured in childhood, so they learned to fight for themselves. The problem starts with their, I'll hurt you before you hurt me attitude.

That attitude essentially reflects their fear, and their insecurity. Such a person does not understand that they can protect themselves and take care of themselves without directly attacking and belittling others. It is not a display of self-esteem, but rather just another iteration of the same problem. Assuming, with the exception of direct aggression or manipulation, that people do not act with a conscious intention to hurt or exploit us, but simply out of an underdeveloped awareness of other people's values and feelings, there is no reason to react with anger. If we react with anger, we may sabotage a relationship that has the potential to be of good quality. It is crucial to recognize, define and explain our boundaries, needs, and desires at the earliest possible stage of any relationship we have with other persons. We must do this before dissatisfaction builds. I use jade stones all the time. Jade stones are a jade-green stone (surprise, surprise) with a smooth surface. All we do with a jade stone is run it over the skin in the direction of lymphatic drainage, towards the heart. Sometimes the stone comes in the form of a roller - the stone will be in the shape of a cylinder on top of a handle and will roll across the skin when you move it. We also jade-stoned the models at London Fashion Week. I personally prefer a full jade stone that fits the facial contour rather than a roller but that's just my preference as it covers more space in one go. Jade stone works the skin out by promoting lymphatic drainage, which will bring down puffiness across the face and improve blood circulation, which will get you glowing. It is smooth enough not to damage the skin - just make sure to oil (or serum) your face well first and go gently. Work it outwards from the centre of the face to the jawline and do it every day if you can. I can stand behind this one as I see an immediate difference myself. The problem, is that we have not learned to pay attention to the messages of our emotions and our bodies, and react to those messages quickly. This frequently results in an emotional, sometimes physical crisis, which result from our failure to react. Be aware of these message, and then calmly, without fear, guilt, or anger, explain to the other person what you want or what you disagree with.

To the extent that you are unable to, you will feel uncomfortable and anxious in contact with that person, which is why we usually attribute the blame to them and not to ourselves. We must understand that just as we do not respect ourselves and our needs, we frequently do not respect them and their needs, even if it is only in our minds. It is important to understand that if you feel uncomfortable in your interactions with a person, it is likely that one of you has been unable to set boundaries that the other will be able to respect. Certainly, some people simply dislike us, and cannot be friends with us for some objective or subjective reason. However, if this is not the case, then it is likely that there is a problem in establishing boundaries. For example, the person may be taking more than they are giving. That's why it's important to set boundaries. This is a trend that's here to stay. Charcoal masks You'll see these all over social media - pictures of influencers, celebrities and your favourite bloggers coated in a sticky gothic black substance - these are charcoal masks. Charcoal, when activated, becomes more porous and gets a larger surface area like an absorbent mini-sponge. It works like a very gentle magnet to `suck' dirt and debris from the pore. This makes charcoal a worthy skingredient if your masque or product is high in activated charcoal. If it is at the bottom of the ingredient list, give it a miss. And if it's one that you peel off along with the top layer of your skin, AVOID! I like Seoulista Charcoal Detox Instant Facial. A good charcoal mask will contain lots of activated charcoal (if it's not activated, it doesn't work the same way). It will benefit you and, most importantly, others interacting with you. What to do when your love It's not easy to watch a loved one struggle with codependency, and in most cases, people don't know how to put themselves in that situation.

Here are some tips to teach you how to help your partner with their codependent condition. Although sadness is an integral part of life, if you notice that your partner is going through a period of intense feelings of sadness that last for more than a few days, these may be the first signs of the codependent condition. There are several things you can do to help yourself and your partner more easily push through that challenging period for both of you. How to identify symptoms of codependency in your partner Do not take these symptoms as a rule, as symptoms of codependency can vary from person to person. The most common symptoms include feelings of sadness that lasts at least two weeks, loss of interest in hobbies, friends, sex, eating disorders, sleeping disorders, nervousness, hopelessness, helplessness, feelings of worthlessness, sudden outbursts of anger, constant expressions of criticism, and/or suicidal thoughts. Encourage your partner to seek help Bubble masks Bubble masks look and are applied like your traditional clay face mask but within five minutes of wearing them, they become puffy and bubbly, like a fluffy grey cloud across your visage. The way they get them to bubble has to do with a type of ingredient known as perfluorocarbons that can dissolve oxygen gas. In the packaging process, they blast oxygen gas into the mask and lock it into the pressurised packaging. When you apply the mask to your face, the oxygen that was introduced into the mask returns to its gaseous state and causes the bubbles. Basically, bubble masks introduce some oxygen to the surface of the skin and this improves circulation, bringing nutrients and oxygen to the skin's cells. I said `some' for a reason - salon or clinic oxygen facials are proven to do this, but bubble masks aren't necessarily. Like any mask, how beneficial it is depends on the ingredients but it may provide a little extra oomph than a regular mask. It's kind of more of a fun gimmick but skincare is self-care so if you like that gimmick, why not go for it? There is the issue of oxidation but the low amount of extra oxygen that would be added to the skin maximum once a week (and probably less) probably wouldn't make a huge impact. Codependency can be so debilitating that the individual becomes incapable of seeking help, and many of those who are codependent are ashamed of their condition. If you suspect that your loved one is suffering from this condition, I suggest that you consult an expert. Schedule an appointment with a psychiatrist who will make the right assessment and be sure to ask your partner if they want you to go for moral support.

If your partner refuses to see a doctor, consult a specialist about the following steps. Educate yourself The more you learn about codependency, its symptoms, its impact, and how it is treated, the easier it will be to understand what your partner is going through, and the easier it will be to help them make important decisions about their treatment. Ask questions, read articles, and consult an expert. Talk to your partner's doctor about anything you need to learn about. Encourage your partner to open up to tell you all the most hidden thoughts that pop into their head. Having a serious and honest conversation about their feelings will make it known that you care, that you take them seriously, and that you will, in some way, bring them relief. At-home LED masks LED masks are usually futuristic plastic masks that contain LED panels or bulbs on the inside. You pop them onto your face for about ten minutes per day and let them do their work whilst you sit back and enjoy how Daft Punk you look. My favourite brand is Dermalux when it comes to professional LED therapy, but this is also a treatment that can be done at home. In a study on the effectiveness of at-home LED masks undertaken in 2007 by Seun Yoon Lee at the National Medical Center in Seoul, it was found that, over a twelve-week period, inflammatory acne improved by 24. When you compare this to a study on LED light therapy performed in a clinic in which there was a 77. On top of this, they must be used daily for ten minutes. I guess that is up to the individual. What I can say is that an at-home mask can still have an effect and it is certainly a cost-effective method compared to professional LED therapy. Professional Skincare Treatments Avoid complicated topics, stick to simple words, and do not condemn. Listen--listen carefully to everything your partner has to say, be careful not to interrupt them and never finish their sentences. Participate in the repair

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