Music is a connector

Ask yourself what role you can play, or simply ask someone what you can do to help. How can you offer your time, energy, or skills to someone or something you value? Why is it important to you to help this person or cause? How does the practice of contribution offer you a sense of purpose and belonging? Because this testing method is valid in application to all forms of human expression, calibrations have successfully been taken for literature, architecture, art, science, world events, and the complexities of human relationships. The test space for the determination of the data is the totality of the human experience throughout all time. Mentally, test subjects ranged from what the world calls normal to severely ill psychiatric patients. Subjects were tested in Canada, the United States, and Mexico and throughout South America and Northern Europe. They were of all nationalities, ethnic backgrounds, and religions, ranging in age from children to elders in their 90s, and covered a wide spectrum of physical and emotional health. Subjects were tested individually and in groups by many different testers and groups of testers. In general, the results were identical and reproducible, fulfilling the fundamental requirement of the scientific method: perfect experimental replicability. Subjects were selected at random and tested in a wide array of physical and behavioral settings: on top of mountains and at the seashore, at holiday parties and during the course of everyday work, in moments of joy and moments of sorrow. None of these circumstances affected the test results, which were found to be universally consistent irrespective of extraneous factors, with the singular exception of the methodology of the testing procedure itself. Because of the significance of this factor, the testing method will be described in detail below. Although individuals will differ in what types of friends or community groups they like best, there are certain characteristics that are found in all friendly nations of the soul. The Kind Of People We Want To Be With In a nutshell, your right community is made up of other people who: 1) like you and 2) let you be who you feel you were meant to be. This can just be a general feeling of acceptance or it can actually be spelled out as the principle and purpose of a formally organized community, such as a church or self-development group. As one person told me, When I'm around these people it allows me to feel a certain way; When pressed to describe how she recognized her new community of friends as being ideal for her, she noted how relaxed and comfortable she felt around them.

She also reported the feeling with her group that it is okay to try out new parts of myself. The purpose of our closest relationships is to build energy. Using this energy barometer is a foolproof method for recognizing people you need to be with. If you come away from a contact with someone feeling drained and less interested in doing things, you have been in the wrong place for your true self. Keep good company You now have a better understanding of who you are and what you value. Do your friendships bring you closer to the person you want to be? Do they empower you to pursue your dreams and live out your values? Remember that the people you surround yourself with can shape your perspectives, character, and entire life. Choose these people with care. Create distance from those who invite drama or negativity into your life. Invest your energy into the people who deserve it. Who did you choose to distance yourself from today? Who did you choose to spend time with today? THE TESTING TECHNIQUE Two persons are required. One acts as test subject by holding out one arm laterally, parallel to the ground. The second person then presses down with two fingers on the wrist of the extended arm and says, Resist. The subject then resists the downward pressure with all his strength. That is all there is to it.

A statement may be made by either party. While the subject holds it in mind, his arm's strength is tested by the tester's downward pressure. If the statement is negative, false, or reflects a calibration below 200 (see article 3), the test subject will go weak. If the answer is yes or calibrates over 200, he will go strong. It means that you felt stuck in playing some kind of role, and also that the other person was relating to you through a rather rigid persona of his or her own. It is hard to generate much good energy between two personas. It's like rubbing two pieces of cardboard together; When we are with the right kind of people, we feel lifted up, more alive, and more alert than usual. After contact with these kinds of people, we feel like we can do things and do them well. It is as though our interaction with them takes us to another level of optimism and possibilities. Whether our goals are large or small, it makes no difference. The right kind of friends gives life a sense of enjoyable adventure. As noted above, another characteristic of a desirable community of friends is a palpable feeling of freedom to be your true self. You do not have to feel guilty if there are disagreements or you have to say no. In what ways do they add to your life? How do you define good company? Find your people Humanity is a massive, interconnected web, and you are connected to everyone within it. Knowing and believing this can provide a profound sense of comfort and belonging within a seemingly chaotic world. You might also find it encouraging to know that you are already connected to the people you want to meet;

Yesterday, you practiced being selective about the company you keep. Now, consider the kind of people you want to bring into your circle. Who can you reach out to today? Contact someone you admire or would like to connect with. To demonstrate the procedure, one might have the subject hold an image of Abraham Lincoln in mind while being tested, and then, for contrast, an image of Adolf Hitler. The same effect can be demonstrated by holding in mind someone who is loved in contrast to someone who is feared or hated, or about whom there is some strong regret. Once a numeric scale is elicited (see below), calibrations can be arrived at by stating, This item [such as this article, organization, this person's motive, and so on] calibrates over 100, then over 200, then over 300, until a negative response is obtained. The calibration can then be refined: It is over 220? Tester and testee can trade places, and the same results will be obtained. Once one is familiar with the technique, it can be used to evaluate companies, movies, individuals, or events in history; The test procedure, the reader will note, is to use the muscle test to verify the truth or falsity of a declarative statement. Unreliable responses will be obtained if the question has not been put into this form. Nor can a reliable result be obtained from inquiry into the future; It is necessary to be impersonal during the procedure to avoid transmitting positive or negative feelings. In other words, you're free to have free will. In good relationships and supportive communities, the roles people play are flexible conveniences, not moral mandates. These roles can be modified to fit individual needs and real friends will accept the changes and adjust accordingly. This freedom and flexibility are not about being impulsively selfish or abusing the rights of others according to your whims. It just means that your relationships with important others are not threatened when you need to change your mind about something. Differences and changes can be negotiated without threatening the underlying bond of the relationship.

This idea of freedom and flexibility in friendships was a hard one for another client of mine, Celeste, to grasp. She had been trying to define for herself the kinds of friendships she wanted to keep. With some guilt, Celeste realized that one of her oldest friendships actually left her tired and exasperated whenever she and this friend spent much time together. Celeste felt badly about saying no to this friend because she had always prided herself on being there for her friends. Sign up to be part of an interesting group. Post on social media that you're seeking like-minded people to collaborate with. Make the first move . Identify or describe the person you want to connect with. What draws you to this person? What does your connection look like? Why is this connection important to you? Who did (or will) you reach out to in order to build this connection? Transform small talk Every moment of your day is a chance to transform the ordinary into the extraordinary. Accuracy is increased by having the test subject close his eyes, and there should be no music or distractions in the background. Because the test is so deceptively simple, inquirers do well to first verify its accuracy to their own satisfaction. Responses can be checked by cross-questioning, and everyone who becomes acquainted with the technique thinks of tricks to satisfy themselves that it is reliable. It will soon be found that the same response is observed in all subjects, that it is not necessary for the subject to have any knowledge of the matter in question, and that the response will always be independent of the test subject's personal opinions about the question. Before presenting an inquiry, we have found it useful to first test the statement I have permission to ask this question. This is analogous to an entry requisite on a computer terminal, and will occasionally return a no answer.